I Came Back

I feel like there has been a lot of silence. I haven’t been on Animal Crossing for a while now. Everything’s probably gone to hell there, as my my once hands-on mayor-hood spirals into the turbulent weed infested abyss. To the villagers who have left me - I am sorry. Reality was just that bit more time-consuming these last 2 weeks. 

I’m finally 23. Just under 2 weeks ago I moved into my new flat. Exactly a week ago I celebrated my birthday. I’ve been working mad hours and running backwards and forwards from place to place. The bittersweet havoc of life. And I still haven’t bought a lightbulb for my main light. I found a nice little lampshade for it though. Not really useful at this moment, but I’m trying in my small way to make the best of everything put in front of me.

Let’s talk about the flat. The flat I never viewed but instead impulse grabbed in desperation on my fruitless hunt. I drove down on my own in my car, with pole, duvet and music equipment. Oh and Cornelius my plant strapped in the passenger seat. I paid a lump of money and was handed keys to my surprise studio. I had no idea what I would find.

It took a while for me to calm myself down on arrival. Hysterical on the viewing of my new property I half laughed/half cried at the state of it all. The random selection of junk furniture mixed with no main light bulb combined with mould all over the bathroom ceiling and generally discoloured walls everywhere really took it out of me. But the ceilings were really high. I could lean out my bay windows and see the sea. My best friend lived a street away. My favourite coffee shop was across the road. It was quirky and bold and strange, and slowly once I built my pole and put my belongings about the place I realised it was a great space for me. It’s a great studio and my friends love it. 

(a picture of my flat with the first of my things in it)

Situations like this remind us of our uniqueness. How we can take blank walls or a dishevelled space, and really make it our own. We can always make somewhere ours and get the best from anything if we attack it head on. The last 2 weeks have taught me a lot about myself. I am adaptable, fierce, strong and capable. I can laugh at what should tear me down. Almost a month ago I was so depressed it actually terrified me. Thoughts ran through my head that made me afraid of myself. But I carried on and stuck around and here I am now out the other end of yet another life transition. And it is beautiful here. It is so beautiful. I could never have dreamed to be close to so many people I love, by the sea, with summer round the corner. I wouldn’t trade these peeling walls and battered furniture I stumbled upon with anything else. Every day I can look out those glorious bright windows at the endless sea and remember that I did it. I came back.

AKC x